Many people are not happy with the lives that they lead because they feel that they are not being their true selves and the pretenses of being something that they are not is taking its toll mentally and emotionally. It takes a lot of mental and emotional energy to be something that you’re not, to create a mask or several layers of a mask to hide the inner true you. Maintaining this false self creates friction in the mind that generates tremendous unease and unhappiness.
There are numerous reasons why we hide our true selves from the world, part of it is to do with fear and not being hurt, so you put up barriers to protect your true self. But creating barriers also has an adverse effect, by keeping people out it also prevents you from accessing your true inner self and by doing so your true self becomes a shadow that creates ripples of uncontentment in the layers of your false self..
Peeling back the layers of your false self is not an easy task and may take a number of years to fully realize your true self. But the journey of self-discovery is worth taking because the reward is to become your true self with all your brilliance.
The first step in removing the layers of your false self is to rediscover who you are, because with all the false layers of self, you may have forgotten who you really are. The way to do this is to look at the following areas of your life:
What are your interests
What comes easy for you
What do you love doing
What are your experiences ion life
What have you always wanted to be as a child
What are you good at
Look at what resonates with you the most; look at what really talks to your soul. This may take a number of cycles to get right, but when you do, you will have a sense of elation and relief, because you no longer have to maintain your false self’s. Your false self’s will fade away only leaving your true self.
Who you are will give you the strongest feeling in your heart and soul. Perhaps you are doing part of who your true self is at the moment and don’t even realize it or don’t consider it part of your true self. For examples I have always loved writing especially creative writing and have written a number of articles but at the time I didn’t think that it was the real me, because I didn’t think I could make any money out of my writing since the field was so competitive and there were so many better writers than me.
I was creating another barrier to my true self by refusing to follow my true path to self-realization because of monetary reasons. I thought to myself, I have responsibilities in life I can’t just go and follow my passions, it’s irresponsible.
There is a big difference between a fleeting passion and your true self. My urge to write wasn’t just a passion it was my true self, it was a major part of what defines my true self, writing is my way of breaking down the layers of my false self by expressing my true self through my writings. Sometimes we get confused by our passions and assume they are part of our true self when in fact they are not and are related to our desires coming from our egos.
It takes a lot of soul searching to discover your true self and there will be times when you will stop and start. Because you may think you have found your true self only to discover it was another layer of your false self.
Knowing that you have found your true self does not coming from thinking you are in your true self but by feeling it. When you are in you true self you are resonating with yourself and everything seems to fall into place, it is not a place of thought but a place of peace and harmony, because this is your most natural state that doesn’t require layers of falsity. You will have a feeling of oneness with yourself and feel that you are whole again. When you are in your true self everything becomes easy because it is coming from a place of authenticity.
For me, my writing is my true self; your true self doesn’t have parts that are indistinguishable from other parts but are all whole and combined. My true self is my writing; my love, my integrity but they are not parts of my true self but wholes of my true self. In your true self there is no fragmentation, there is only the whole you, this is the reason why you feel peaceful when you become your true self, because the wholeness of your true self reverberates into every fibre of your being and in the world.
No matter what stage you are in your life or how old you are it’s never too late to redefine yourself. I am forty seven years old and it has taken me this long to embrace my true self. The length of time to become your true self is less important than the journey of self-discovery, the more you discover about yourself the closer you become to your true self. The journey towards your true self is an on-going journey, because you are always discovering new things about yourself.
You may feel fearful in this journey towards you true self, because you have never shown the world your true self .Maybe you have been criticized in the past for showing your true self so you kept it hidden from others and yourself. It is your right as a human being to be true to yourself because only by being true to yourself you can realize your full potential. No one can tell you to be like someone else because being your true self is more important. If people don’t like your true self then they can leave your company, by being your true self you will attract people who really resonate with your true self, not negative people who are just trying to fit you into a box for their own convenience.
In my journey of self-discover I have left many people behind because they were not congruent with my true self and I found new friends who were accommodating to my true self. By transforming ourselves into our real self’s we are redefining who we are, because who you are today can be very different to who you become when aligned with your true inner self.
True freedom is becoming your true self
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